Fein the rules dating

Years ago, on a slow work day, I was perusing a stack of “for grab” books at the nonprofit where I worked when I found a gem from 1995: “The Rules,” Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider’s guide to dating.

The book provides 35 fool-proof rules for getting a man to marry you.

Readers began -- and continue -- to set up free online and offline support groups around the world and visit our website ( at the rate of over 400,000 hits a month.

Back then, there were only a handful of dating websites.And these women have been asking us for a book of Rules for dating online.As many of you know, our first book, The Rules, spawned a worldwide movement.Don’t write on his wall, don’t send him Facebook messages, don’t let him see any of your photos—keep him on a limited profile view.Don’t interact with any mutual friends you may have. You can pretend you’re receptive to a booty call, but when suitor arrives at your apartment, don’t answer the door.,” which is “a guide for younger woman to dating successfully in the age of Facebook, Twitter, IM, and other potential relationship wreckers their mother never had to face.” It’s being published by Grand Central in early 2012.[#image: /photos/590953c32179605b11ad3b18]The original “Rules” first appeared in 1995. In “The Rules for Online Dating,” which was published two years ago, Fein and Schneider advocate creating screen names like “Blond Beauty50” or “Petite Brunette34,” waiting 24 hours to respond (and not responding on weekends or holidays), and not saying things like “Nice abs” or “Cute Pic.”The year after “The Rules” came out, Laurence Kirshbaum, the C. “My reaction to it is one of great sadness,” he said, “in that if this is what relations between the sexes have come down to, I think we’re in trouble.” I feel similarly. Also: if I were to “score” a man using the Rules, and were I able to continue using them all throughout my life (as the Rules advocates), how would I—and my relationship—not feel completely disingenuous?

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